January 2011
13 posts
Duane Reade
A Duane Reade pharmacy in Brooklyn is now serving beer. And for a limited time you can still get Obamacare on tap.
Smoking
A new study found that smoking a cigarette can cause genetic damage within minutes. The most alarming effect is giving camels the need to wear sunglasses.
McDonald's
An assistant manager at a McDonald’s in Minnesota was recently fired for letting Vikings star Adrian Peterson use the bathroom after closing. Or as the manager put it, he was sacked in overtime.
Tiny Dog
Researchers have discovered the fossil of a tiny dinosaur that was the size of a dog. It was hiding in Paris Hilton’s purse.
IBS
A new study found that exercising can help relieve irritable bowel syndrome. They came to this conclusion after auditing a yoga class.
Charlie Sheen
Charlie Sheen was reportedly doing vodka shots yesterday at a hotel in Las Vegas. He drank his favorite brand, Absolut Idiot.
Public Restrooms
A new study found that ATMs are just as dirty as public toilets. But only cause you have to touch more buttons before making a deposit.
1/11/11
Today is 1/11/11 or the binary code’s version of gay pride day.
$5,000 Burger
A restaurant in Las Vegas just unveiled a five-thousand-dollar burger. You can find the restaurant by looking for the actually golden arches.
Spiderman Musical
The injured actor from the Spider-Man musical was actually in the audience for tonight’s show. The actor said he laughed, he cried, he hid under his seat for cover…
Christmas Tree
Sad news. The Rockefeller Center Christmas tree came down today. And I give it three months before the tree releases a sex tape and checks into rehab.
Penguin
I read about a baby penguin at a zoo in Germany who wandered into the lions’ den to get warm. Once the penguin was there, all the lions felt underdressed.
Battery Thief
A man in Florida was arrested for stealing 36 batteries from a Kmart. It took a long time to catch him, the chase kept going and going and going and going…